Posted April 11, 2008
By tseigler

I’ve been cranky and nauseous lately; could I be pregnant? Don’t laugh, there’s a guy out in Oregon who’s with child. Anything is possible.

Male pregnancy has been mainly the realm of Arnold Schwarzenegger movies and…not much else, actually. It’s such an unthinkable event, but now it’s medically within reach. Granted, that guy in Oregon used to be a woman, and forgot to have his/her uterus removed before this. But still, the possibilities are endless.

I’m reminded of a “Cosby Show” episode, from one of the last seasons (when the kids went from cute to annoying). Cliff Huxtable and the other males of the family were supposed to be pregnant, but when it came time to deliver they didn’t have babies. Cliff’s son-in-law in the Navy had a model battleship, and Cliff gave birth to a foot-long Hoagie and a bottle of orange soda. I believe that was a reference to a Greek myth about a god eating his kids, but I could be wrong.

Anyway, fathers who double as mothers aren’t yet another sign of the Apocalypse (as the fundamentalist Christians would have you believe). It’s just the ultimate victory of feminism. When men get a sense of just how painful childbirth really is, they might be nicer to the women in their lives. Bill Clinton wouldn’t just be blowing smoke up a woman’s ass when he says “I feel your pain.” Besides, I hear that blowing smoke costs extra, that and getting another girl to join in.

That’s my political-sex-scandal for the week, enjoy it.