Abstinence-only Sex Ed won’t stop a hormonal teen from getting his bolt cutters.
Lynne Spears has successfully raised another spectacular role model for America: 16-year old mom-to-be Jaime Lynn Spears. One-upping her infamous sister, Britney, by seven years, Jamie Lynn is part of a rising national trend of teen pregnancies.
For the first time in 15 years, teen birth rates increased in 2006, following a 34 percent decline since 1991, according to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). The CDC reported that teen pregnancy rates rose from 40.5 births per 1,000 females aged 15-19 to 41.9 births — representing a three percent increase. That’s 127,647 more baby K-Feds.
So why can’t kids keep it in their pants? The overweight, balding teachers preaching abstinence in health classes aren’t doing the trick? Trojan commercials — in all of their Spartan glory and catchy jingles — aren’t catching on? Passing out pills and patches to middle schoolers isn’t slowing the swimmers? Teens blame embarrassment about buying contraceptives, peer pressure, legitimization of sex by the media and siblings (thank you, Britney), and parental influence. I agree with the latter and am personally lamenting the fact that Lynn’s parenting book has been “delayed indefinitely.”
Don’t worry South Carolina, we don’t need a “Raise your Kids for Rehab How-To” — we’re already above the national teen (15-19 years) birth rate by 11 percent (52-41). Go team.
But there is good news for the state. No, the jackpot didn’t hit the $100 million mark and Rockingham isn’t getting NASCAR back, 13-14 year olds aren’t getting knocked up…as much. The age group has seen a 23 percent decrease in giving birth, compared to an 11 percent national decline.
Despite those numbers, teen pregnancy is still on the rise overall. Of the national 3 percent increase, Stephanie Ventura, of the Center for Disease Control, said: “It’s way too early to know if this is the start of a new trend, but given the long-term progress we’ve witnessed, this change is notable.”
Teens who participated in focus groups suggested better communication with parents would help solve the problem. So would waiting until you have facial hair and your voice doesn’t squeak.
What began as a national concern finally hit Hollywood, hard. Hopefully moms and dads will take a day out of their alcohol-providing, let-me-be-your-friend parenting ways to do for their tweens and teens what Coach Carr from “Mean Girls” did for Lindsay Lohan: “Don’t have sex because you will get pregnant and die…if you touch each other, you will get Chlamydia... and die.”
Lindsay may be a lot of things (coked out, DUI-ed out, rehab-ed out) but she’s not pregnant (or contracting Chlamydia). Maybe Dina Lohan should write a book.
