Probably not something you’d spring on a girl you just met, but she may be getting the same message from you subconsciously. Everyone sends and receives subtle, nonverbal communication. It’s constant and nine times out of 10 you don’t even realize you’re even doing it. Pick up on tell-tale signs or even cover up your true (x-rated) intentions with these common body language clues.
First glance – If your stare catches a stud’s and he’s half-smiling, run. But not after you let him buy you a drink or two. This guy’s looking for a one-night lover and he thinks you’re his lucky lady. Body language expert Patti Wood says, “A sneer-like grin is an indication that he’s not being sincere with you. It’s a split-face gesture.” So unless he’s hot, you’re horny and everyone’s OK with being half-sneered at for the night, move on.
Guys like to touch, scratch, rearrange, etc. themselves – often and in public. But what everyone blames as an uncomfortable itch and an inappropriate gesture could also be a subconscious (or conscious) move. A move to draw your attention to his, ahem, assets. Less conspicuous signs such as touching his belt or hanging his thumb from his front pocket are all red flags and sirens.
First date – So you found a chick who actually fell for that cheesy pick-up line. If she uses her hands a lot in telling you she can’t believe Wendy’s is your idea of a “nice place” to eat, at least you know she’s a great communicator. Maybe if you buy her a Frosty you’ll find out that people who use their hands a lot in conversation tend to be more attentive and generous between the sheets. Good luck with that one, pick-up line boy.
If your idea of a “nice place” doesn’t involve dollar menus and squirt ketchup dispensers, you’re on the right track. If she laughs easily and it’s not the nervous, high-pitched, I’m-laughing-because-I-don’t-know-what-else-to-do-laugh, you’re dead-on. A date who loves to laugh is usually someone who is open, relaxed and able to be herself around you. She’s subconsciously telling you, “I’m letting my guard down. Don’t screw this up.”
First time – We’ll make the assumption that everyone reading Bootleg has good taste and, therefore, realizes Wendy’s might not be the best place to take a date. We’ll also assume everyone who reads Bootleg is outrageously good looking and charming and is now in bed with ______. If ______ maintains eye contact, it means ______ may want more than just a session in the sack. Holding a gaze, even for a few seconds, indicates that ______ is exposing themselves emotionally.
As great as you ridiculously good looking, charismatic, tasteful readers are, ______ obviously has to pass out in a bout of sheer exhaustion. If ______ sleeps face-down, it means they are punctual, hands-on, successful and full of passion and energy. It can also be a signal that ______ is controlling. Some people are into that.
First fight – If you use pick-up lines and drive-thrus, your first date is probably also your first fight and your last. In an argument, if he’s fidgeting in his chair or tapping his fingers, he’s nervous about something. While this could just be nerves, if it stops when his explaining stops, it could indicate that he’s feeding it to you.
Watching his face for clues can also give him away if he’s lying. If his eyes glance up and to the right, he’s just recalling information from memory; if he looks up and to the left, he’s lying. If you catch him tugging on his ears or nose, it’s another sign he’s probably being deceptive. When a person is lying, blood tends to rush to the face, making the ears and nose get warm and itch. Just remember to listen to what he’s actually saying and don’t stare intently at his face for the entire conversation.
Now when your mouth says, “Nice to meet you,” you can make sure your body’s saying it too, not “You’re ugly as hell, go away.”
